First Breath • •

[sebastian finley whelan]

With school starting back up for pretty much everyone, Seb thought a day at the fair would be exactly the thing they needed. The flyer had been in his mailbox a week earlier, but he had chucked it on the kitchen counter with the rest of the take-out menus and leaflets that usually came through the door. It was only one late breakfast when he saw that it was different from all of the rest. Matt would be back in a classroom in less than a week and Seb was due to have his first lecture of the year in two weeks. It would be pretty difficult for any of them to catch a break and take some time off once that happened, so the fair seemed like a pretty decent idea and the last chance for some carefree summer fun. Soon the weather would get cooler, the rain more frequent and the brothers would be hunched over textbooks and essays rather than video game controllers. Once Matt had offered his positive opinion on the idea of the fair, Seb called Lilia to see if she would be interested in joining them, maybe even with Issy. He didn't know if the little girl would like something like the fair, but he knew Lilia was always looking for something new to entertain her niece with.

After a morning of volunteering at the hospital, Seb made his way back home, hopped into the shower and then spent an hour playing video games and doing the chores that he had put off all weekend. Instead that weekend had been spent with controllers, junk food and very little acknowledgement of the time. It was a good way to end the summer vacation in Matt's opinion, and Seb had only been too happy to go along with that. It wasn't like his apartment was left a mess, but things like the laundry and the few dishes that were in the sink, kind of remained there for an extra day. It didn't bother either of the brothers and Seb whizzed through the ignored cleaning duties as quickly as he could before texting Lilia to see if she was still coming and to see if they were good with the time he and Matt had decided on that morning.

Matt took a little long to haul away from the video game which was “just getting interesting” apparently. However, Seb still got him out of the door on time and soon enough they were out on the street, the older Whelan thrusting a jacket at the younger. He could have taken the car, but Seb didn't know what the parking situation would be when they got out there and the last thing he wanted was to be driving around for near half an hour just looking for a spot that wouldn't land him a ticket. It took a little longer than he would have liked, but they were still pretty much on time for what he had told Lilia. He had already spoken to her and explained that they'd meet outside. If they planned to meet inside then he knew it would just be an afternoon of wild goose chases and constant “where are you?” text messages. He wanted the day to be fun for them all, not long and full of crowd searching for familiar faces.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 559!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Finding things to keep Issy busy with was starting to get difficult the closer to the end of summer. There were only so many trips to the beach they could take before either of them got bored. And the zoo's had the same old things going on in them so one or two trips were usually good to last Lilia at least. Issy got distracted by the animals for a little while before she wanted to see the next one or have a snack. So when Seb brought up the circus as a thought, Lilia agreed it was a good idea they could try. She was always looking for something different to do with her little niece that left the little girl exhausted at the end of the day and let her sleep through the night. Lilia didn’t know if Issy would be quite old enough to remember this trip to the circus but she’d thought it was a good idea when Seb suggested it. She liked the circus at least and there were plenty of opportunities for fun and games. Her main concern was Issy being terrified of something and having to rush her out before she interrupted the show even though the little girl was usually good for her auntie so Lilia didn't think they'd have trouble with her.

Lilia packed a backpack with things for Issy, a couple bottles of her favourite juice, which seemed to be the only thing Lilia could get the girl to drink lately and a couple of her favourite smaller toys just in case. Then she called out to the toddler, hoping she’d come tottering in when her name was called. She was small but already very good on her feet, running around the house, yelling gibberish at the top of her lungs with a mix of real words to get her point across. But the little girl never came and Lilia had to go searching her out. When she finally found Issy, she had crawled under her bed with just her little toes sticking out so after taking a picture with her phone, Lilia crawled under as much as she could to see her niece reaching for her favourite stuffed rabbit but the animal was just out of reach for the little girl. Being a good aunt, Lilia scooted it close enough to Issy so she could get it herself before wiggling back out from under the low bed. “Now that you have your bunny are you ready to see Seb and Matty?” Lilia asked the little girl who smiled up at her aunt with a huge grin on her face as she squished the stuffed animal to her chest.

Laughing, Lilia got to her feet before lifting Issy up into her arms and continuing through the house, grabbing the keys and the backpack before locking the door and heading down to the street to hail a cab. The parking, if there would be any, would be atrocious and Lilia was not about to waste an hour just to find a place to park her SUV when she would probably already be running late with the traffic to get there in the first place! She settled Issy into the middle seat and held the toddler close as she told the driver where they were headed and she stayed that way until the driver pulled to a stop just around the corner from the main entrance. She paid and got out, immediately settling Issy on her shoulders. The adults had decided to meet outside the lot so it wouldn’t be an afternoon of playing Marco Polo just to give up in the end. "Let out happy squeals when you see them." Lilia said to her niece once the toddler was settled and ranting away in her partial baby gibberish. The Scottish Med student had barely turned the corner when her niece started bouncing on her shoulders and squealing delightedly. She tried to get down from her aunt’s shoulders herself but that was not happening and Lilia had a tough time keeping the little girl where she was until she got to the boy’s they were meeting. “Hey Handsome.” Lilia said once she stopped next to Seb and Matty. “And Hello there, Seb. Can I get some help?” She asked, looking from the Irishman to the little girl barely staying on her shoulders with the excited bounces. “Seems someone’s happy to see you both.” She commented, laughing.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 744
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

A few years ago and Seb's summer would have been filled with trips and vacations with friends. He hadn't been opposed to jetting off on a whim and taking a trip down to Mexico or out west to California. It had been part of the student fun and what he worked hard for at the end of every semester. Now he was the one who would drive friends to the airport and pick them up from trips like that. Seb might have missed the careless fun in the sun, but not enough for him to resent or hate his current situation. His trips with Matty were a hell of a lot tamer, that was for sure, but Seb enjoyed the weekends camping, or the winters when he would try to encourage Matthew to improve his snowboarding skills so he could take on the bigger snowy challenges along with his brother. It was fun, just a different variety of fun.

Seb didn't know how long they'd be waiting for Lilia and Issy, but he heard Issy before he saw the pair. Someone was deinfitely excited for whatever the afternoon entailed even if she was too young to really understand it. Seb was thankful that Matt was practically a teenager when fate had brought the brother closer together again. He could continue with his own life while guiding Matthew on his and the boy was old enough to mostly take care of himself or help out when Seb needed a hand. If he had been younger then things would have been very different for the Irishman. To be honest, he probably wouldn't have returned to New York City after the funeral, but would have stayed in County Antrim instead where he could be closer to family and old friends. Sure, he had a life and friends here, but if the situation had been different then it would have been those who shared his native accent who Seb would have relied on. “She knows good company when she sees it.” Seb grinned, lifting the little girl from Lilia's shoulders and spinning her around once before holding her securely enough that she couldn't bounce free again. “You're always happy to see me, Lilia.” His grin screamed cheeky, but Seb didn't care.

Glancing over the crowds it was easy to say that they weren't the only group to think this trip was a good idea. There were a lot of people gathering around and checking out their options for where to go first, what stall to visit next. Seb wasn't quite sure how they'd fit everything in when it was this busy, but that wasn't something that would put him off for the afternoon. They would have fun one way or another. His attention turned to the trio who made up his company for the day. “So, who wants to do what and first?” He asked, mainly glancing between Matty and Lilia for an answer. He wouldn't mind either way where they started their afternoon of fun, but he would like to get it started sooner rather than later.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 569!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

A couple years ago, Lilia would have been travelling through the summer, exploring the world while she still had the chance to do so. It wouldn’t have been long before she was interning at a hospital, deciding on exactly what she wanted to specialise in and she had wanted to take all the time she could find to start scratching things from her bucket list. And then when Issy’s mom died, Lilia put that aside. Her brother an infant niece needed her and she was okay with putting her life on the backburner for a while. She’d done quite a bit in a short amount of time and though she was hardly through with her list, a change of scenery was on it. So she took time from school, packed her things and moved across an ocean to help her brother and niece adjust. It had broken her heart just as much as it had the rest of the family but no one had ever seen her cry over it. She didn’t particularly enjoy thinking about it because then she just felt terrible that Issy wouldn’t get to know the woman who brought her into the world. Lilia had been lucky to be able to call her a sister for as long as she had.

But this day wasn’t about thinking of her sister-in-law. Though she did think it was infinitely unfair that it was her taking Issy to the circus and not her mother. But she was also happy that Issy did make it through the ordeal and that Lilia could take her out like this. “Well Matty is a good kid so it makes sense.” She said, forcibly bringing herself into the present. She was starting to make it a habit of going down a dark path whenever she got the chance to bring Issy somewhere. It was a habit she didn’t want to keep. “Always is a bit of a stretch and happy is an even bigger one.” She said as if she really was telling the truth. She almost always had fun whenever Seb was involved but she didn’t need to say that to his face; where would be the fun in that?

“We’re here for the kids so lead the way Matty.” Lilia said, motioning for him to go ahead of them. The fair grounds were already packed full with people. It was obvious they weren’t the only ones taking advantage of the nice weather and she couldn’t fault them for sharing the same idea. She could do without any clowns that may be present but she would put up a good front while she was there and not squeal like a little girl if one were to stand within five feet of her. She wasn’t terrified of clowns but she was absolutely not their biggest fan either and she didn’t exactly know what to expect. Of course if anyone with oversized shoes and makeup no one should see came within two feet of her, Seb wouldn’t just be carting around Issy. "So." She started, falling into step just behind Matty. "You going to win little Issy here a stuffed animal on her first trip to the fair grounds?" Lilia asked, looking up at Seb.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 539
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

Seb hoped nothing else tragic happened in their lives. Especially not Matthew's. Of course the time would come when The Reaper would ride again, but Seb wanted his little brother to be much older and maybe even with a family of his own before that happened. Most of their family back home were still on the young side, but that counted for nothing really. Seb just didn't want to have to break the little boy's heart again with another Whelan loss. Their parents had been taken suddenly and cruelly, and it was something he knew neither of them would ever truly get over. Even in twenty more years they'd find moments or memories that would make it feel like their hearts were breaking all over again. Seb didn't want Matty to forget where they came from or the wonderful people they had been raised by, which was why he was glad that the little boy was old enough to have a childhood full of memories to remember them by. Seb would do everything he could to help Matty out in the future, but he was a big brother, not a parent and there were things he wouldn't be able to control.

“A good kid? This one? He just likes to pretend that's the truth.” Seb grinned, tormenting his little brother like only a brother could. Seb had every intention of teasing Matty and embarrassing the hell out of him for as long as he possibly could. If Matty ever brought a date home then he would regret it the second he saw Seb's cheeky grin. If he was foolish enough to do that in the first place then maybe he deserved to be humiliated by his big brother. “Deny it all you want, we both know the truth; you can't resist me.” There was a subtle but heavily flirtatious tone in Seb's voice and his deep blue eyes did more talking than his lips in that moment. This game of theirs was fun, but there was only so long they could keep it going for before someone rumbled their dance and told the pair of them to get a room or get over themselves. Until then though, Seb would keep up this pretence of the chase with Lilia. It was fun and reminded him that there was more to his life than past tragedies and nursing rotations.

Seb kept close to his little brother at Matty began through the crowds, looking at the games and the stalls and everything else that came with the fair. The crowds would get a little annoying in a while when the heat built and the children started growing cranky and tired. Until then though there was nothing stopping them all from having fun. “Of course, everyone gets a stuffed animal when Sebastian goes to the fair.” Seb grinned, using his full first name in a rare moment. He felt it truly added to the game though, and Matty's grin was big enough to prove him right. “Seb never loses at these things.” He told Lilia, looking up over his shoulder at the pretty brunette. “And if you had to go through Mr Rogers' rugby training regime you wouldn't either.” The man had retired a few years ago, but he had put Seb through his paces and challenged him so much during high school rugby that Seb pretty much owed his strength, discipline and hand-eye coordination to the man.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 583!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Lilia wasn’t the kind of person to dwell on the past, even if she did travel down memory lane too much for her own good. Everything that had happened in the last few years had brought her where she was, made her who she was and gave her purpose in what she wanted to do with her life. Before Issy’s birth and her sister-in-law’s subsequent death, she hadn’t known what she’d wanted to do with her life. She’d known she wanted to help people, she wanted to be a doctor but she hadn’t known exactly what kind of doctor she wanted to be. And afterward, she’d narrowed it down to a handful of options but she still had plenty of time to choose. It was days like these that gave Lilia the reasons to slow down for a day or two. She was so busy trying to graduate from medical school that she too often forgot that she did have a life outside of classes and work.

It was a given that worries would disappear with a few hours in Seb’s company. He never failed to bring her from a funk or make her laugh when she desperately wanted to pout. In those aspects, she knew if Seb hadn’t been in her life, it would be a hell of a lot duller than it was. “Still better than you, even if he is pretending.” Lilia said with an unladylike snort. She absolutely was not against teasing Seb relentlessly about his personality. He was a giant flirt, they both knew it. He was terrible and Lilia didn’t help in the least, egging him on more and more every time they were in the same room together. “I’m here to give Matt someone else to talk to besides his overly flirtatious, borderline womanising brother.” She said as though she were bored and just giving him the truth. In fact, there were plenty of words she would use to describe Seb but womaniser wasn’t one of them; it might have been considered before but not since Matty moved in with him.

The Scottish girl had made sure that her niece was well rested and ready for the day ahead of her before they’d left the house. She didn’t want a cranky toddler on her hands only twenty minutes into their adventure that day. She figured she had a couple hours before exhaustion finally caught up with the toddler and then it would be time to call it a day. But she wasn’t going to worry about it until that happened either way. “I don’t know. I think he’s got some competition with you.” She said to Matty, grinning as she reached out to ruffle his hair a bit. She had always thought that he shouldn’t have had so much to deal with in his young life as he had and felt like a little bit of encouragement could go a long way to building up his confidence. And it gave Lilia and excuse to pretend like she was actually knocking Seb’s ego down a few pegs. For her it was a win-win situation.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 519
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

Seb's dreams of nursing had been around since he was a teenager. He knew people often questioned it and asked him a million things whenever he first mentioned it to them, but it had never deterred him. He was a joker at heart, a funny man who could charm his way out of any situation given half the chance, but he wanted to help people. Long before his parents passed away, long before he even moved to New York he had dreamt of it. Being a doctor was too much for him, he would admit it, but he was more of a people person, which is why he wanted to be on the wards, helping out even with the little things and trying to bring a smile to the faces of the patients. He still had some way to go before he could call it his career, but nothing could stop Seb from travelling down this path he was on. One way or another he would make his dreams a reality.

“Hey, every girl loves the roguish type. I don't need to play good.” Seb grinned, throwing in a cheeky wink for good measure. He could get away with it, so he pushed his luck more times than he probably cared to keep track of. The important thing was that he knew when a mood required him to be serious, and he knew where the line was between playful teasing and something much more. He was there to make people laugh, to cheer them up; not to cause trouble. Even if he could get himself out of it easily enough it wasn't something he enjoyed. “Oof, stick and stones, Lilia. Besides, Matty loves my company. I teach him the ways of the world.” He teasingly messed up his little brother's hair and laughed when Matty only rolled his eyes. Sometimes he honestly had no idea how his little brother put up with him, but despite the age gap between them they had always been close.

Seb didn't know how long little Issy would hold out for today, but he was determined to fit in as much as they could before it was time for the toddler to head back home with her aunt. He scoffed at Lilia's words, including a dramatic roll of his eyes for effect. Then, playfully, he grabbed Matty and pushed him along. “Come on now, we don't need you developing an ego before you're a teenager.” Matty was only a few months away from that milestone, but Seb was never going to let up with his brotherly teasing, no matter how old the little boy was. They walked a little further before Seb's eyes landed on the hot dog cart. “Anyone fancy lunch before we test out this old throwing arm?” He flexed his muscles foolishly and grinned. Luckily his throwing arm was not connected to the shoulder that had needed surgery a little over a year ago during one of his more dramatic snowboarding trips.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 508!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Despite all the terrible things that happened in her life so far, Lilia tried to keep a outlook on life. She didn’t want to be tied down by memories so sad; she didn’t feel like getting out of bed some days. She wasn’t that person. She got out of bed each and every day because she had something to live for and she wasn’t about to waste a day doing nothing when it could be filled doing something. It was the whole reason she studied so hard. She wanted to make a difference; she wanted to help people so they didn’t feel like she did, especially like Theo did when they lost the love of his life. Issy would never know through firsthand experience but they were both determined to make sure Issy knew her mother. If it was the only thing in the end that Lilia could do, she would damn well do it.

“Johnny Depp and that pirate movie didn’t hurt either.” Lilia said drily. As if the roguish type didn’t have her looking twice! For the longest time, mostly before the move stateside, she’d thought her type was her last boyfriend. He’d been sweet, kind, made her laugh and while they’d been together, she’d loved it. He’d been attentive and backed off when she was in foul moods. But then she moved, and she got a taste of the real world and realised that though she’d loved it then, it all happening the same way would kill her. Even though she and Seb weren’t categorised as anything more specific than friends, he didn’t do any of what she’d known. He drove her mental, always coming back with snarky responses and he didn’t back down when she was in a bad mood, he crowded her, practically forcing her to tell him what was up. It helped more than she wanted to admit. Lilia smiled up at Seb innocently. “I hope he doesn’t take it to heart. Poor kid’s never going to get a date.” She teased knowing full well if Matty turned out anything like Seb, he’d probably have the ladies lining up around the block, falling for that smile.

Teasing Seb didn’t get old, or at least it hadn’t yet. Not that Lilia honestly expected it to. He made it too much fun to tease and torment him because he fought back. He wasn’t scared of her sarcastic tone and gave as good as he got. With her attitude she probably should have picked a different career path but god help her, she wanted to be a doctor; had her heart set on it and everything. “A small ego never hurt anyone, one your size on the other hand.” She said, trailing off. This teasing would probably not end well by the time they were done at the fairgrounds but until then Lilia was determined to enjoy herself, teasing and tormenting as they wound their way through the throngs of people and attractions. “Prolonging the inevitable failure?” Lilia asked, looking up at Seb with wide, innocent brown eyes. “Do you see a pretzel stand?” She continued as if she hadn’t just challenged him.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 526
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

Nothing good came from wallowing in misery. Of course, with the death of his parents Seb had spent a few weeks feeling nothing but an emptiness inside and asking himself a thousand questions about what would happen next. Everything he thought he knew was thrown into doubt and it had taken him a while to get himself back on track and pull Matty back with him. It was a dark patch that could have been a lot darker had he not had a little brother who needed him then more than ever before. After that, Seb had made it his personal mission to make sure that no one he cared about slipped too far when life dealt them a bad hand. If he could he would make sure that no one would ever have to go through what he and Matthew had gone through, but the loss of parents was inevitable at some point or another and Seb didn't have the answer for eternal life. So, all he could do was be there when people needed him to be, whether he was a friend or a nurse.

“Who needs Johnny Depp when you've got this standing in front of you?” He gestured to himself with a wicked grin, ignoring Matty's scoff and eye roll. “You both need to get a room.” The twelve year old told them, as though he was subjected to their terrible flirting on a regular basis and simply couldn't take enough of it anymore. He still had a whole day to get through in their company! Seb had always been a terrible flirt ever since he was in high school and had realised that the girls were looking twice at him. He was a good guy, a good boyfriend, but so long as there was no harm to come from it he wasn't afraid to show he was interested. “Please, the girls will be fighting over him when he's in high school.” Seb said with a grin. He knew Matthew would meet a great girl sooner rather than later. He was a sweet kid with a heart of gold and Seb knew that was one thing about his brother that wouldn't change.

“What ego? Mine is practically minuscule!” Seb insisted with a large grin. The teasing was all part of the fun, since in reality his ego was about as real as Batman. It was part of a flirtation, part of the silly game he liked to play with Lilia. Nothing about his ego was really how he felt and he knew Lilia knew that. However, if their little dance ever changed, Seb felt like he might have missed it. He didn't want it to go away between them; whatever it was between them. “Failure is not a word in the Whelan dictionary.” Seb said with a simple shrug, narrowing his eyes at the brunette girl. “There's one just over there.” He pointed through the crowd, just off into the distance behind most of the other attractions.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 512!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Lilia put all her pain and anger into her classes and school work. She had so much of it to do and there were still years ahead of her to get rid of it all. Plus she had Issy and Theo to think about and of the two adults, one of them had to have a clear head about things. She could mourn in private. There had been plenty of times when it first happened that Lilia hid away in the showers, letting her tears melt away with the running water. It had been the only time she’d been alone back then, having enough self-control to keep her head on straight when everyone else was sobbing into each other’s shoulders. Lilia didn’t want to lose anyone else; even though she knew it was inevitable. In truth, she wasn’t sure she could handle it but that was what compartmentalising was for. So she would deal with it and take it all in stride.

“Me. You’re beside me, not in front of me.” She said with as bland a tone as she could muster, teasing him. Lilia laughed at Matty’s comment, shaking her head at him. She was glad Issy wasn’t old enough to really get what was happening around her. She understood the excitement and the busyness but she didn’t understand the conversation. And that was all the pair of them needed another one to add to mention their terribly flirtatious behaviour. Lilia didn’t flirt with everyone, at least not to the same extent that she did with Seb. A little light flirting had gotten her better tips at the end of the night and sometimes that little bit of extra money was exactly what Lilia needed to put in the savings account; medical school wasn’t paying for itself. And as for her teenage years Lilia was more one of the guys than one of the girls the guys flirted with. Sure, there were a few that dared to break through Lilia’s stubborn tomboy façade and bring out the girly girl in her but it wasn’t until that term abroad that she really grew out of it all and started wearing dresses and skirts and heels more often. Maybe that was what Barcelona did to a girl. She returned a whole new girl much to the terror of her brothers. “I have no doubt about that.” She agreed, winking at the pre-teen with them.

Lilia raised a brow towards her hairline, looking up at Seb. “If you were a giant maybe.” She muttered under her breath but still loud enough that the ego in question could hear her well enough in the crowd. She knew well enough Seb’s ego was nearly nonexistent unless it was something silly like this. She had no idea what was going on with them but it was fun and easy and Lilia liked it. She didn’t want to lose it. “I don’t know. I think I might need proof of this.” She said as if she were skeptical of Seb’s skills. Lilia couldn’t claim to know much of anything about sports. Theo wasn’t an avid fan of anything in particular, preferring films and television shows to hone his accents and mannerisms over sports matches. Alan was the more sports inclined sibling and since her move to America, she hadn’t actually seen a match at all. Lilia followed where Seb was pointing, nodding her head before turning to Issy. “Well, honey. What do you want to eat? Do you want a hot dog or a pretzel or what?” She asked, looking at her niece for an answer. She brought snacks for Issy knowing how picky she could be at times and wanted to be prepared but she would try some carnival food first and see how that went first. Lilia laughed when Issy indicated she would try whatever Seb was going to have. “Suck up.” Lilia teased, tickling her niece’s side.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 654
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

There was no such thing as truly getting over it. Seb sometimes found that it hit him like a freight train out of nowhere when five minutes earlier he had been laughing as though he didn't have a care in the world. He knew Matty had it the same, too. It was difficult, but there was time and a whole lot of things out there for both of the brothers to cling to to help them move on and grow from the grief. Seb would do his best to fill the void, but he knew he was far from perfect for the job. Eventually Matty would have to help himself in places where Seb was unable to do much more than be a big brother, but Seb was fairly confident that the twelve year old would succeed when that time came around. He was already so clever and so mature for his age, although the tragedy had sort of forced him to grow up sooner than he probably ought to have. It was sad, but Seb couldn't do anything about it. He was just as powerless about it now as he had been then, so all Seb could do was be there for when Matthew needed him to be.

“Tom-a-to, To-mah-to.” Seb said with a shrug, waving Lilia's words off with a flick of his wrist. As terrible as he could be, Lilia brought out the worst in him. That was probably putting it mildly, too. Whenever he was around her Seb wasn't capable of behaving at all. He was always flirting with her, acting like there wasn't anything to be taken seriously when they were together. He should probably stop and actually think about why he did that because it wasn't like Seb did it all the time. There were, surprisingly, moments in his life when he did act his age and take life as seriously as it was supposed to be at times. He wasn't just flirting his way from one second to the next with a charming smile and a cheeky wink.

He opened his mouth to reply and then thought better of it, his eyes moving to look at both of the minors in their company. His retort was definitely not one for their little ears. Not even Matthew who heard plenty from Seb and often was horrified, amused and repulsed by some of the things his older brother said when he forgot he was around should hear what was about to roll off his tongue. “Some innocence needs to be spared.” He said to explain why he had suddenly fallen quiet instead of replying sharp and quick like he usually would if it had just been him and Lilia alone. However, he had to be mindful of Issy since he didn't want the little girl going home to Theo with new words in her vocabulary that might have the Scottish father exploding and threatening death. Seb would rather that reaction be saved for the boy who tried to take her on her first date. “You'll have your proof, just try a little patience, my dear Lilia.” Seb said on a sigh, as though she was always demanding that he prove himself. Usually when she did they ended up flirting more and acting silly, and that usually put them both in situations that again were not appropriate for younger eyes or ears. At least that had been the case last time. “She's just got good taste.” Seb grinned as he guided them towards the food stand and reached for his wallet, letting everyone order up before paying.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 609!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Lilia didn't allow herself to think too much about the past because it was just so depressing. She thought about it a lot more when it was one of Issy's firsts. But she knew Jenny was up there watching over her little girl. And though it wasn't the same, if Lilia didn't have that belief, she didn't know where she'd be when it came to that little girl. She was already out of her depth with it all but it could always be worse. At least, for her, she hadn't lost a parent, or both. She'd lost a sister for sure, and they were close but it was always worse when it was a parent. She saw how Seb and Matty got on and she was so impressed that they'd managed to keep everything together the way they had. She knew without a doubt that she wouldn't have been able to do that. She could see that Seb was doing an excellent job with his brother and that he would turn out to be just fine when he was older.

The Scottish girl couldn't help but laugh. She knew if there were a scenario in which she actually had to choose between Seb and Johnny Depp, it wouldn't be a contest; Seb would win hands down but she also wasn't about to share that little bit of insight with the man. Give him an inch and he'd run a bloody mile with it. With Seb it was different than work but she wasn't ready to look deeper at that. She was enjoying the moments of it all. Lilia enjoyed spending time with Seb. She let herself relax around him and just went with whatever crazy idea or conversation came their way. And it was usually pretty ridiculous, full of flirting and pushing limits that probably shouldn't be pushed. She, like everyone else, understood there were times to be silly and times to be serious. Once she stepped through the doors of the hospital for her classes or time there, she was serious. She laughed and joked with her patients and those she was volunteering with but it was to put them at ease for whatever was to come or whatever she was doing at the time. Keeping them talking kept them calm and she could do what she was there for.

She'd been caught by Seb in the hospital before and though they flirted with each other like teenagers, they didn't keep it up for long, with each of them there for specific reasons, they couldn't just drop everything to have a coffee and flirt shamelessly with each other. Unfortunately, it was all too easy to forget she wasn't alone with Seb. She'd found herself more than once having to shake her head to remind herself she wasn't alone with him and had to mind her words and actions. But watching Seb look at his brother and her niece reminded her that she needed to be mindful. They weren't alone, they were in the company of children with even more of them walking past in each moment. "Right." She said with a quick nod, tossing aside the rest of that conversation for another time; maybe. "Promises, promises." She said with a sigh as though Seb were always disappointing her. Lilia rolled her eyes at Seb, even as she ordered something for herself and for Issy. "She's not allowed." Lilia said, wishing that were true.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 574
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

The past was the past; unchangeable and difficult to get over at times. Seb's life was so busy in regards to the future he was working towards that he didn't have too much time to worry about the past these days. There were the odd moments when sadness would overwhelm him, or there would be nights when sleep wouldn't come for him and instead he would be left in the darkness with only thoughts of what could have been. Moments like that could be tough for him to deal with, but he knew they were also unavoidable. They were a part of the grief that came with losing his parents and taking in Matty. Seb would worry more if time passed and he realised that he didn't miss them in the slightest. He knew that was impossible, it would never happen, and he would take the moments of pain and sorrow over that any time.

“You know I take your silence as a win for me, right?” He asked, eyebrows raised and his usual cheeky smirk in place. Seb could be terrible when he wanted to be, especially when Lilia was involved. He was definitely a people person. He enjoyed socialising, bringing a smile to people's faces. He had never been able to understand why some people hated society and longed to hide away from the rest of the world and avoid communicating with them as much as possible. Seb was the complete opposite to that. He thrived on interaction and loved chatting to new people. They might not love it when he randomly approached them and struck up a conversation, but he was a friendly guy and he came from a place where everyone in the community knew everyone else. New York City was totally different to that, but Seb didn't want to lose that vibe that he had grown up with in County Antrim. He wanted to know his neighbours, be friends with the mail man and know the name of the person he bought his groceries from. It seemed to be a foreign concept here in the big apple, but Seb refused to let it go.

Seb knew that half of the people passing by probably didn't care what he said to Lilia, or vice versa. He knew Matty would just roll his own dark eyes and tease him relentlessly when they were back home, or cry something about childhood trauma to try and talk him into buying a new video game for his pain. The kid was tough, but smart. However, Seb wasn't tacky and this wasn't some seedy nightclub where the skirts were short and the drinks were cheap. He had class and Lilia wasn't some trashy girl going home with whatever guy happened to look at her first. He was going to behave, or at least try to, while they were out today. “You know I always make good on my promises, Lil.” Seb said, feigning hurt, clasping one hand over his heart dramatically. “She's allowed good taste. It's just the bad boys who aren't allowed to look twice at her adorable face. Isn't that right, Issy?” He asked, tickling the infant and enticing squealing giggles from the little girl.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 542!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3

[Lilia Jayne Sterling]

Lilia understood the more you loved somebody the harder it was to get over the loss of them. Theo would never get over Jenny’s passing while for Lilia she was someone to never forget and someone to miss but her not being around wasn’t going to cripple her. If the doctor parked his TARDIS right in front of her and gave her the opportunity to change the past, she would wish she could but knew she wouldn’t do it. As harsh a reality that seemed to be. All the movies and books showed that taking a step to the right changes everything that follows if that step had been made to the left previously. Things might have changed for the better, or they might not have. Grief was all part of life but Lilia was still going to make a career out of keeping people away from death’s door just a little bit longer.

“And you have no idea how badly it’s killing me.” She muttered under her breath and hoped with all the background noise Seb couldn’t hear it. She would never live it down. He drove her crazy because she couldn’t really get one up on him. He always had a comeback ready when she said something smart and cheeky. Lucky for her, she could give as good as she got and she didn’t back down just because he’d said something that made her laugh or was too close to the truth for their whatever it was they had together. But they continued whatever it was and Lilia loved it. It made her laugh when they were ridiculous and it made her question too much when things started walking that line in the sand. There wasn’t much outside of her textbooks that made Lilia question things. And then there was Seb; she was in so much trouble.

Conversations like this happened far too often to the pair of them that it was actually strange when they walked the line of serious. Honestly she didn’t know what she would do with herself if she didn’t have Seb. He kept her calm when all she wanted to do was rip her hair out because something was just about to send her off the edge. He was ridiculous and usually made her want to laugh at him and slap him at the same time; it helped. “Oh stop being a drama queen.” Lilia said with a roll of her eyes and a huff like she was sick of hearing the same old line every time he opened his mouth. Lilia quirked her eyebrow towards her hairline, looking up at Seb while she tried to supress her grin. “Are you going to be the one scaring those bad boys off with an evil glare?” She asked conversationally. It was probably the job for the daddy but then again, she’d been in those shoes and it had been her brother’s scaring off the boys interested in Lilia. Of course, she hadn’t given a damn either way back then and when she did start caring, she was more than capable of letting those boys know if she was or wasn’t interested in them. “Because I have to say, you’re not so scary.” She said, letting the corner of her mouth quirk up just a little bit, aware she was probably pushing those buttons again, yet unable to help herself.

Tag|| Seb!
Words|| 565
Clothes|| Cutest Clown
Music|| Maybe - - -One More Girl
Notes|| <3

[sebastian finley whelan]

The brothers would move on with their lives. They’d miss their parents. There would be times when they’d wish they could call them up for advice, or to tell them some good news, but at least they could share that sentiment with the other. Seb knew that there was a strong chance of Matt being in the car with them the day of the accident at the Old Road, and he would be eternally grateful that they had already dropped Matt off at his friend’s house. They had relatives back home who maintained the grave on behalf of them, kept it topped up with flowers and drank in the memories of the brother, sister, cousins, aunt, uncle who they had lost, but it wasn’t quite the same as losing a parent, especially when they were both still so young. Matty had so many more milstones to hit in his life, and Seb was supposed to be the one making them proud by settling down into adulthood later rather than sooner. Those things would still happen, but their parents just wouldn’t be there to tease or congratulate them when they did.

“Hm? Did you say something, Lil?” Seb thought he had heard her voice, but with the rest of the noise around them he hadn’t been able to actually pick out any words. With all the crowds and the noise from elsewhere it was hardly the best place to try and hold a conversation. However, they weren’t really there to have a heart to heart; they were there to have fun, to enjoy themselves, and to treat the kids to a day at the circus. There was already so much to see and do that it was impossible to know where to begin. Just thinking about it was enough to hurt Seb’s head or have him thinking about it in some insane logical idea, like approaching everything in a clockwise manner. Circuses were not logical and should not be treated as such either, so Seb just aimlessly kept walking, hoping Matt would grab onto something or point at another thing.

Seb knew he was acting like an idiot. He did it most of the time without even trying, simply because he knew it was what made Lilia laugh. He’d keep up the silly games and the ridiculous jokes until the day came when she didn’t find them funny anymore. “It’s not being a drama queen when you’re hurting my feelings.” He told her, pouting slightly this time. He shook his head and shot Lilia a knowing look. “No. That’s Theo’s job. And I’m pretty sure that man already had a lifetime supply of ways to keep the bad boys far away from his little girl. Give him a few more years and he’ll have a police man in his back pocket to strengthen his chances, too.” He grinned, already knowing that most fathers of little girls were very protective of them. His own dad had joked in the past that he was lucky to have sons and Seb had sat through a couple of ‘talks’ with overprotective fathers in his youth, doing the usual promises to have them home by curfew, not to break their hearts, and anything else their daddy dearests wanted to hear. “That’s because you haven’t seen me get scary yet. You only see my dashingly charming side.” He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

• • •

TAGGED! Lilia <3
WORDS! 574!
OUTFIT! Nerd Nurse!
LYRICS! Only One - - The Icarus Account
NOTES! <3 <3 <3